An emotional wall many struggle to confront
The lack of presence of the emotionally available parent or primary carer — just not being available due to societies stresses, short term priorities, and so on
– affecting the parenting environment.
Psychologist Allan N Schore called this “Proximal Abandonment” — when the parent is physically present but emotionally absent.
Emotion plays a huge role
Growing up in lack of, it wasn’t hard to envy other kids at school. Main envy was having parents, I guess it was the movies as a kid that gave me the idea. The idea that those with parents have it better and easier than I do. Starting off in elementary school I became privy to stories of numerous friends who hated their parents. When I asked why I couldn’t comprehend at the time that we all had the same issue. An emotional disconnect from those who raise us, mostly it was kids whose parents had to work long hours. When they were home they were tired and angry, for a child you think it’s your fault.
I had friends that were amazing at arts and sports but gave up just as I did because their parents didn’t express interest. You can’t blame the parents who have no choice to work endlessly, we do live in a society that makes it hard to find time for your family. Despite it is up to the parent to express to their children the realities of work and survival. This can be done in numerous healthy fashions that’ll help them to understand time management. Many parents are angry at their parents and take care of their children out of obligation, not the love of.
This in turn leads to children absorbing the anger and rage of the parent, as models of excellence in their eyes shaping a growing mind. Simply providing for a life is not enough to raise a life to be strong and healthy mind, body, and spirit. It takes tenderness and realizing what you do and say ultimately affect other people especially your children. Children are the ultimate test of selflessness in my opinion, if your selfish and still living for yourself wear protection PLEASE!. It’s okay to live how you like and figure yourself out just don’t bring other life into your entanglement. It’s selfish!
Too many of us millennials were born with or raised by angry self-serving individuals. Yes this was conditioning and it’s obvious as an adult what the issue is here but it doesn’t excuse irresponsibility and perpetuation of trauma. Today here and now is where it ends, many of us are born with sacred knowledge and gifted insight into what's wrong here! We’re taught to only think of “I” and forget to safeguard the youth. Now they look towards media, influencers, and fads for support on who to be, it’s time for good men and women to no longer stay silent. Step in and guide youth crying out for help instead of saying “That’s not my child” be gentle and remember your inner child the real you!
You who loves all creatures like unicorns or dinosaurs to humans unconditionally. The you who felt sad if you saw another kid crying, the one who loves to share and help. Even if you can’t be there all day all the time. Make time to make emotional contact with your children and strengthen those bonds. I believe in Us!